Programming

Programming today is a race between software engineers striving to build bigger and better idiot-proof programs, and the Universe trying to produce bigger and better idiots. So far, the Universe is winning.

-- Rich Cook

Secrets

Why must you tell me all your secrets when it's hard enough to love
you knowing nothing?
-- Lloyd Cole and the Commotions

Success

People want success. It's like coffee, they want instant.
-- Sir Bobby Robson

You're not drunk

You're not drunk if you can lie on the floor without holding on.
-- Dean Martin

Rules for writing a novel

There are three rules for writing a novel. Unfortunately, no one knows
what they are.
-- Somerset Maugham

Choices

There are no choices. Nothing but a straight line.
The illusion comes afterwards when you ask "Why me?" and "What if?".
If you had done something differently, it wouldn't be you, it would be someone else looking back, asking a different set of questions.

-- Max Payne

Style

"Never offend people with style when you can offend them with substance."
--Sam Brown

Wise advice

Many people are desperately looking for some wise advice which will
recommend that they do what they want to do.

GOD AND MONEY

If you want to know what God thinks of money, just look at the people he gave it to.

-- Dorothy Parker

Maturity

The first sign of maturity is the discovery that the volume knob also turns to the left.

--Unknown

The sun

The sun was shining on the sea,
Shining with all his might:
He did his very best to make
The billows smooth and bright --
And this was very odd, because it was
The middle of the night.

-- Lewis Carroll, "Through the Looking Glass"

Debugging

As part of the conversion, computer specialists rewrote 1,500 programs;
a process that traditionally requires some debugging.
-- USA Today, referring to the Internal Revenue Service
conversion to a new computer system.

Winners

A winner never quits, a quitter never wins!

Picasso Quotes

Computers are useless. They can only give you answers.

The chief enemy of creativity is good taste.

God is really only another artist. He invented the giraffe, the elephant, and the cat. He has no real style. He just keeps on trying other things.

My mother said to me, "If you become a soldier, you'll be a general; if you become a monk, you'll end up as the Pope." Instead, I became a painter and wound up as Picasso.

-- Picasso, Pablo

Man on Fire

Forgiveness is between them and God. It's my job to arrange the meeting.

Revenge is a meal best served cold.

--- Denzel Washington in Man on Fire ---

Enemies

You have enemies? Good. That means you've stood up for something, sometime in your life.

--- Winston Churchill ---

The Truth

Humanity has committed some of its worst crimes in the name of the truth. Men and women have been burned at the stake.

The entire culture of some civilizations has been destroyed. Those who committed the sin of eating meat were kept at a distance. Those who sought a different path were ostracized. One person, in the name of truth, was crucified. But before He died He left us a great definition of the Truth. It is not what provides us with certitudes. It is not what makes us better than others. It is not what we keep within the prison of our preconceived ideas. The Truth is what makes us free.

"Know the Truth, and the truth will make thee free," He said.

--- A story by Paulo Coelho ---

Ambition

At the age of six I wanted to be a cook. At seven I wanted to be Napoleon. And my ambition has been growing steadily ever since.

--- Salvador Dali ---

Discovery

One of the greatest discoveries a man makes, one of his great surprises, is to find he can do what he was afraid he couldn't do.

--- Henry Ford ---

Humans

Human beings, who are almost unique in having the ability to learn from the experience of others, are also remarkable for their apparent disinclination to do so.

--- Douglas Adams ---

Discuss

"Great minds discuss ideas; Average minds discuss events; Small minds discuss people"

(Eleanor Roosevelt)

Clarke's first law

When a distinguished but elderly scientist states that something is possible, he is almost certainly right. When he states that something is impossible, he is very probably wrong.

Arthur Clarke

Limits

Every man takes the limits of his own field of vision for the limits
of the world.
-- Schopenhauer

The principal difference between a dog and a man

If you pick up a starving dog and make him prosperous, he will not bite you.
This is the principal difference between a dog and a man.
-- Mark Twain, "Pudd'nhead Wilson's Calendar"

HEAT

Don't let yourself get attached to anything you are not willing to walk out on in 30 seconds flat if you feel the heat around the corner
--HEAT

understand

understand, v.:
To reach a point, in your investigation of some subject, at which
you cease to examine what is really present, and operate on the
basis of your own internal model instead.

Everybody's looking for something

Some of them want to use you,
Some of them want to be used by you,
...Everybody's looking for something.
-- Eurythmics

The Elephant

Five people -- an Englishman, Russian, American, Frenchman and Irishman
were each asked to write a book on elephants. Some amount of time later they
had all completed their respective books. The Englishman's book was entitled
"The Elephant -- How to Collect Them", the Russian's "The Elephant -- Vol. I",
the American's "The Elephant -- How to Make Money from Them", the Frenchman's
"The Elephant -- Its Mating Habits" and the Irishman's "The Elephant and
Irish Political History".

repetitions

If you don't say anything, you won't be called on to repeat it.
-- Calvin Coolidge

contact our support team

Unknown User:

Under: Supported local payment methods I see three boxes labeled "Free" -
"3%" - and "Free" . Could you explain this please and tell me what sort of
intoxicant your graphics designer is using?

Command

Command, n.:
Statement presented by a human and accepted by a computer in
such a manner as to make the human feel as if he is in control.

21st century aircraft

Earl Wiener, 55, a University of Miami professor of management science,
telling the Airline Pilots Association (in jest) about 21st century aircraft:

"The crew will consist of one pilot and a dog. The pilot will
nurture and feed the dog. The dog will be there to bite the
pilot if he touches anything.
-- Fortune, Sept. 26, 1988
[the *magazine*, silly!]